Facing Hate

Memoir of a Social Smear

Facing Hate is a memoir of my journey through social smearing. Others will glean from my story — whether they’re victim of social smearing or they’re wound up in a hateful “mob” — they, too, can restore relationships and rebuild their reputation.

My smear started in 2014 when the idea of ruining someone’s life with little more than a social media account and line of gossip was rare. Not so today. Those with keyboards and an axe to grind can bring ruin to a life, a family, a business. In my case all three were brought to their knees and nearly ruined. The mob’s weapons of choice are online shaming, censorship, character assassination and ultimately canceling.

And they’ve been largely successful. Few make it through an online social smearing, and even when they do, they are forever changed, forever weathered from the new narrative written by mobs of hate.

But no one deserves it. Though social smearing appears to be accepted in today’s online world, it is an evil beast that must be defeated. My story reveals how.

Listen to Chapter 1: Joy and Anguish (FREE)

I read the entire book to my family over the course of several weeks as we gathered together for Sunday morning breakfasts. Pardon the grandkids and babies in the background.

The audiobook for Facing Hate will be released on Audible on May 1, 2021.

Table of Contents

• Prologue
  What is “social smearing”? You need to know. It is a raging virus of which we’re all at risk. (Originally launched June 2019 before delaying publishing of the book.)
• Chapter 1: Joy and Anguish
  Before diving into the behind-the-scenes details of our social smear, it helps to know the history of the Jeub family. It started 30 years ago when Wendy and I met…and it’s quite the story.
• Chapter 2: Our Smear
  We were posting fun photos of our big happy family one day, fighting accusations of felony-level abuse the next. The most painful, unjust journey of our lives had begun. 
• Chapter 3: Lean In
  There is no escape from an online smearing. Even traveling to Oklahoma, Minnesota and Australia provided no solace. But we weren’t running away. Instead, we were “leaning in” and embracing some hard-to-face truths of our own secret sins.
• Chapter 4: Rush
  I was desperate. Those suffering from a social smear sometimes seldom find an escape from the pain and loss. But my escape eventually came several months later with a confrontation with the truth and a bombshell encounter with my accuser.
• Chapter 5: The Game
  Freedom from my social smearing would take offline experiences, not an online victory. The next opportunity revealed itself sooner than I would have guessed, and it turned out to be a significant win that helped move the mountain that was crushing me and my family.
• Chapter 6: Heart Rock
  Most see Wendy and me as a rock-solid married couple. But our foundation was so shaken that we turned on each other, nearly breaking our marriage. Hiking out of this dark valley was the most difficult journey of our lives.
• Chapter 7: Hiring the Smeared
  A parent picked up all the online gossip about me, old news by now. The school “hired an abuser,” she posted, and she set up a Facebook group and started lobbying for my termination. The fight of my life continued.
• Chapter 8: The Right to Overcome
  Did the mob accept defeat? No. They left their social media platforms for more-legit media, appealing to the Colorado Springs Gazette.
• Chapter 9: Silence
  We’ve all witnessed online hatred ruin people, businesses, and ministries. Why? The online mob continues to seek and kill and destroy, and I think I know the reason. And I must confess that I helped in training them to do so.
• Chapter 10: How to Think
  Appeals to sympathy don’t matter to the mad mob. We must stand against them. But how? I have an answer, and it has to do with REAL debate.
• Chapter 11: Rules of Engagement
  Sometimes engaging the hateful mob is needed, but using traditional argumentation and debate tactics will get you nowhere. Consider advanced persuasion, as well as the costs of doing so.
• Chapter 12: Love in the House
  Most people today struggle with this social dilemma: We have online narratives that contrast with our true lives. Worse yet, we’re waking up to the realization that we have been manipulated to believe in one against the other.

Latest News on Facing Hate

• Invitation to Review Facing Hate (December 4, 2020)
• Read or Listen to Facing Hate online — free, for now (November 30, 2020)

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